#1 - M
I shall call him M.
Some of you may read this and start smiling because it would dredge up a whole lot of memories that would make you feel sick with nostalgia.
Sometimes, we'd rather not remember the good times to keep ourselves from missing it with the every molecule in our body. Don't we?
If I am not wrong.
The first time I saw M, was when he was wearing green or dark maroon metallic rimmed glasses.
He was really skinny, very tanned, had a bowl shaped hair cut and has a dimple.
I distinctly remember the glasses. For a stupid reason.
It was because I wanted the same ones like his too.
Even though I had perfect vision.
M came into my life when I was only 9.
And when we were 9,him, together with another girl, we were already best friends.
At an age where everyone was still pointing fingers and making fun of a girl and a boy standing beside each other,and singing silly songs like the K-I-S-S-I-N-G one, something rare can prevail.
The seniors were all making fun of us, and each time, he would just get all fierce and retort that we were his best friends, shut up.
The other girl soon grew distant as she went into another class while M & I got into the same classes then on throughout.
He was the first ever guy to call me up and talk hours.
First ever guy to just singly go out together and chat around.
First ever guy to steal something for me. It was really silly. He was explaining to me at Parkway that as long as this particular item is rubbed off the item, the item can go through the sensors undetected. I didn't believe him, and he went ahead and told me to pick something and proved it to me.
Thinking about it now makes me smirk at our idiotic acts sometimes.
Now here's the thing.
It was a totally one-sided affair.
M long knew that I had a huge crush on him.
Yet he kept quiet.
He didn't avoid me.
He didn't change anything.
He continued being who he was to me.
Most people change once they know things like this but M stayed.
He continued his phone calls, talked nine to the dozen, listened to music together [ We were really into pop music then. N'sync, S club 7, vengaboys etc etc BSB!].
He continued everything he did before as a friend.
He had other best friends later on towards graduation.
But we still remained buddies, though not as close as before.
I still keep the cards and gifts he gave.
Even up till now.
As there were no sad memories with him, only smiling ones.
He was one of the person I would have followed if my PSLE marks were on par with him.
Alas, after we graduated, we really drifted.
I do not know what happened but one day, we just switched to different frequencies.
We rarely talk on msn anymore.
We totally never call each other anymore.
And on occasion, we drop facebook comments.
We always say we'd meet but we never.
Just because our lives now are so different.
So that would be the saddest memory I would have of M, of how things can just fall apart on their own and there is nothing that can be done about it, coz that's just how things are.
M happens to live very near me by the way.
I occasionally bump into him now and then - here.
But like I said, in recent times, hardly.
C'est la vie.
--------------------------------------------------------------
#2 - Z
Z was my so called international secret.
It was a huge joke to my primary school friends as what was supposed to be a "secret" can be so blatant to everyone.
I bet if they read this now, they'd be laughing their asses off.
Z came into my life the last year of my primary school education.
He was a transfer student, and he looked really dorky with his S-shaped fringe.
*Laughing already*
He had a chunky watch, head almost botak except for his fringe, almond eyes, quite fair and vampire teeth.
Surprise, surprise, I don't know how the hell he got to sit beside me -.-
But days there after were funny.
We chatted about almost everything, I asked stupid questions, he'd look at me incredulously and ask why I ask these type of questions but still answer me nonetheless.
He told me that his father passed away, he lives with his mom and two sisters.
We really did talk a lot, nine to the dozen in fact. Found out that he only kept the S-shaped fringe was because if he cut it off, he'd be totally botak and he didn't want that -.-
He did well in his work, out of the entire class, only Jacq's, his and my essays were picked to be showcased.
We didn't keep in touch after graduating, however I do occasionally ask how he was doing from a friend who went into the same school as he did.
That was how I found out that during his secondary school days, he was diagnosed with a brain tumor. And then on I started to get in contact with him, asking how he was doing and such.
Thank goodness, he was alright in the end.
And during out erratic and very very random/occasional contacting, he apologised.
For spoiling a pen of mine when we were in primary 6.
Apologised, SEVERAL YEARS LATER.
He kept it in his heart for so long, when I've already moved on.
It was true, I was very upset, but it wasn't because of the pen, it was more of why he cannot let me have my way and draw on his desk or why didn't he feel bad when he spoilt my pen.
And so many year after, he apologised.
I was literally gobsmacked. I did not expect him to keep note of it at all.
And somehow, it made me smile.
The last time I saw him was when he was going to church. He looked must healthier. =)
Seriously, I feel like laughing whenever I think of him, thanks to the diary I kept that year.
I recently unearthed a very very very old diary.
It was a diary for the year 2000, a yellow hard cover spiral bind one with some korean cartoon on the cover.
I was literally blushing as I flipped through it as it was full of childish thoughts and writings.
I once wanted to throw away the whole diary as my mother kept on threatening to invade my privacy.
She lock herself up in my room. I don't know for what but she is really known to rifle through my stuff.
I was so furious, I was brandishing the diary about at my aunt yelling and complaining that I was going to destroy it.
My aunt took it from me say she'll keep for me.
I said I wanted to get rid of it, she said she will throw it away from me.
Several years after, I mentioned it, and what do you know.
My aunt took it out of her wardrobe and passed it back to me.
................
I guess she knew how precious memories were when I was at an age that didn't know it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
#3 - G
I've seen G before I started secondary school.
Walked out of my room all groggy and squinty eyed to see him in my hall with his side parting and spectacles and frowned at him for coming over to my house at such a god forsaken (it was really 6+am -.-) hour to revise ENGLISH with my brother.
ENGLISH.
REVISE. -.-
Now G, to me, was an absolute laugh fest of a puppy crush.
I cannot help giggling, laughing out loud and all sorts whenever I think about that short stint.
Anyhow, as you may have guessed from the above paragraph.
Yes, a friend of my brother. GAWD, that sounded so damn awful.
NOBODY TELL HIM OR I SHUT THIS POST DOWN. HMPH.
In fact, G was the main reason why me, a TOTAL lazy assed person who used to mock at uniformed groups and their so-called "discipline" and rules, joined NPCC.
WTF. First M, now G. Why am I always the one following people! Why no one follow me!
A guy friend, who would be mentioned later on, was gawking at my reason for joining and was saying that he thinks it was bloody sacrificial of me to do so as he really thinks that NPCC was something that girls usually shunned.
[ Indeed, approx 8 girls initially in my batch, only 3 passed out including me]
*DIGRESS*
However, I will say one thing, I am damn grateful for G's presence and influence in my decision making to join NPCC as it was one of the best decisions I have ever made in my entire life.
Yes, I passed out only a mere corporal ( Auto promoted some more coz I failed the drill test 3 times, was initially an ACTING corporal only.) and skipped SO much of it, that really, I shouldn't have any CCA grade for it at all, but I still garnered an A2 with Mao hurling a vulgarity at me when he found out. HAHA.
Mao is a classmate of mine for 4 years straight in Secondary school.
Initially both of us were logger heads, we'd snap at each other, scream, scold & flip each other's table, but due to NPCC, he is one of the friends I really bother to chase after and call out to chit chat.
The experiences & friends I made, though some may be not in contact anymore, were priceless.
The after CCA lunches, the mad rush we make to KY's house for Holland V last time, eating together, practicing skits and stupid stuff and oh my god the bloody camps and competitions!
Even now in everyday life I use some of the camp craft skills I learned. ( Fcuking terrible at it btw. Only remember the clove hitch i think? For pitching tents and the ship shank for tightening rope. Just used it when tying up CNY decoration for my aunts.)
Felt damn accomplished please.
HAHAHAHA.
OMALA WAS MY SENIOR IS NPCC TOO, though we weren't close at all at that point of time and WITH GOOD REASON TOO THAT MOFO. WTF.
I'll will talk about him later!
KY, Sim & I lived pretty close together, so we'd always take the bus home together after our CCA activities and stop at this central location near our area to go take a look at puppies or just chill at KY's place.
KY, though idiotic sometimes when it comes to stuff and acting all not serious and etc, is very perceptive.
When my 1st relationship was over, remember I mentioned that I literally drag myself out of bed to watch TV, tired already go sleep and all?
I one day, decided to just go to this NPCC outing planned during the holidays to watch a movie.
Best decision I've ever made during that period.
I arrived at school and I couldn't stop laughing. Mao was like, " Trying to cheat me la! Don't bluff , you don't look sad at all etc."
Ky was like the only one after everyone went off and turned to me and asked me whether I was ok anot, still very sad is it?
......... In a very... gentle tone some more sia. =s *tearing up*
ARGH. Don't digress already. Go back to topic!
*END OF DIGRESSION*
Why he caught my attention?
Well maybe it is also because he was my freshmen orientation camp leader and he was putting attention on me due to the fact that he knew me before hand?
It was fun, those days, I still kept paper diaries.
At the end of secondary school, I had a good thick few books filled page to page with assortments.
And there was this book , the period, where there were a lot of scribblings in it about my interactions with G. And I would describe it WORD for WORD please.
If he smiled in a cheeky way, I would write it down.
If he said, " I want to eat bananas and maybe I won't but I feel like eating bananas"
I would write, [ he said, " I want to eat bananas and maybe I won't but I feel like eating bananas"]
I was that irritating. XD HAHAHAHAHAHA
But I did remember writing one sentence that for my actions.
" I write this stuff down is because one day, I am scared I will forget."
Well, no use anyway coz due to my mother's constant risk of the diaries getting into her hands, I one day, after a suspicious/argument episode, threw out one thick stack of diaries.
I do regret doing that. A lot.
And its true, I've forgotten quite a bit of things already.
After secondary school, a good few years into Poly.
I dug through my memo box to pack stuff.
And I found, in a metal blue tin, a stick of gum.
And I was literally smiling to myself about my idiocy.
It was given by G.
Just a stupid simple gesture of seeing me near by and offering me a sweet, I also ate the gum and bothered to fold properly the metal foil and slip it back into the green paper band to make it look as though it was untouched and put it on a metal box so that it won't get crushed some more.
See what I mean when I say I felt like laughing?
By then I was dating ZX already, and I threw it away, figuring that I don't think I would need a memory of another guy anymore.
How silly of me, again.
Oh well!
G like another girl, this I knew, but hey! When it comes to one-sided crushes, you know who to call ;]
-------------------------------------------------------------
#4 -T
T was the sweetest thing ever to happen to me.
Why?
Simply because he was the first ever dude to like me. ME leh.
In sec 1/2 when I was like this short haired tom boy running. screaming and arguing around.
He was in the class beside mine and I didn't know of his existence until things unfolded.
One by one, just like ripples in the water, reactions started clicking off just by ONE simple act.
I walked past this school mate whom my friends are very close with due to their CCA, and asked her whether did she see my said friends mentioned above.
I still remember, that VERY moment I met and asked her.
#1, she bloody stared and stared at me in amazement.
#2, she continued to stare -.- I hope you girls know who I am talking about LOL
And I was like o.O Woah, what is ON my face?
Turned out as the days go by we started to chat if we bump into each other and all, and one day, she blurted out.
"Got someone in my class likes you leh!"
And I was like 0.0 *cue: WUUUUUUT*
And from then on.
Pester time.
pester pester pester her like siao.
Followed her into the canteen,pester pester pester, and when she walk past my class table my class girls were like looking at me and asking what was I doing and when they found out what she said, all of them went 0.0 and also started to pester her like crazy. And Stephanie, who was on prefect duty initially in recess came and asked what was the commotion about and when she heard it, she started to scream and we all know when she screams we really give in to her
And yea.
That friend pointed him out, siting in a row of benches during recess.
...... And you know what.
He was pretty decent looking.
Yes I am so shallow laaaa. Shut up , it was like, I don't know, I had really low self-esteem and wth suddenly some guy I have never met "likes" me?
And from then on, on hell broke loose. And looking back on it, damn. He was damn sweet.
- To be continued-
I shall call him M.
Some of you may read this and start smiling because it would dredge up a whole lot of memories that would make you feel sick with nostalgia.
Sometimes, we'd rather not remember the good times to keep ourselves from missing it with the every molecule in our body. Don't we?
If I am not wrong.
The first time I saw M, was when he was wearing green or dark maroon metallic rimmed glasses.
He was really skinny, very tanned, had a bowl shaped hair cut and has a dimple.
I distinctly remember the glasses. For a stupid reason.
It was because I wanted the same ones like his too.
Even though I had perfect vision.
M came into my life when I was only 9.
And when we were 9,him, together with another girl, we were already best friends.
At an age where everyone was still pointing fingers and making fun of a girl and a boy standing beside each other,and singing silly songs like the K-I-S-S-I-N-G one, something rare can prevail.
The seniors were all making fun of us, and each time, he would just get all fierce and retort that we were his best friends, shut up.
The other girl soon grew distant as she went into another class while M & I got into the same classes then on throughout.
He was the first ever guy to call me up and talk hours.
First ever guy to just singly go out together and chat around.
First ever guy to steal something for me. It was really silly. He was explaining to me at Parkway that as long as this particular item is rubbed off the item, the item can go through the sensors undetected. I didn't believe him, and he went ahead and told me to pick something and proved it to me.
Thinking about it now makes me smirk at our idiotic acts sometimes.
Now here's the thing.
It was a totally one-sided affair.
M long knew that I had a huge crush on him.
Yet he kept quiet.
He didn't avoid me.
He didn't change anything.
He continued being who he was to me.
Most people change once they know things like this but M stayed.
He continued his phone calls, talked nine to the dozen, listened to music together [ We were really into pop music then. N'sync, S club 7, vengaboys etc etc BSB!].
He continued everything he did before as a friend.
He had other best friends later on towards graduation.
But we still remained buddies, though not as close as before.
I still keep the cards and gifts he gave.
Even up till now.
As there were no sad memories with him, only smiling ones.
He was one of the person I would have followed if my PSLE marks were on par with him.
Alas, after we graduated, we really drifted.
I do not know what happened but one day, we just switched to different frequencies.
We rarely talk on msn anymore.
We totally never call each other anymore.
And on occasion, we drop facebook comments.
We always say we'd meet but we never.
Just because our lives now are so different.
So that would be the saddest memory I would have of M, of how things can just fall apart on their own and there is nothing that can be done about it, coz that's just how things are.
M happens to live very near me by the way.
I occasionally bump into him now and then - here.
But like I said, in recent times, hardly.
C'est la vie.
--------------------------------------------------------------
#2 - Z
Z was my so called international secret.
It was a huge joke to my primary school friends as what was supposed to be a "secret" can be so blatant to everyone.
I bet if they read this now, they'd be laughing their asses off.
Z came into my life the last year of my primary school education.
He was a transfer student, and he looked really dorky with his S-shaped fringe.
*Laughing already*
He had a chunky watch, head almost botak except for his fringe, almond eyes, quite fair and vampire teeth.
Surprise, surprise, I don't know how the hell he got to sit beside me -.-
But days there after were funny.
We chatted about almost everything, I asked stupid questions, he'd look at me incredulously and ask why I ask these type of questions but still answer me nonetheless.
He told me that his father passed away, he lives with his mom and two sisters.
We really did talk a lot, nine to the dozen in fact. Found out that he only kept the S-shaped fringe was because if he cut it off, he'd be totally botak and he didn't want that -.-
He did well in his work, out of the entire class, only Jacq's, his and my essays were picked to be showcased.
We didn't keep in touch after graduating, however I do occasionally ask how he was doing from a friend who went into the same school as he did.
That was how I found out that during his secondary school days, he was diagnosed with a brain tumor. And then on I started to get in contact with him, asking how he was doing and such.
Thank goodness, he was alright in the end.
And during out erratic and very very random/occasional contacting, he apologised.
For spoiling a pen of mine when we were in primary 6.
Apologised, SEVERAL YEARS LATER.
He kept it in his heart for so long, when I've already moved on.
It was true, I was very upset, but it wasn't because of the pen, it was more of why he cannot let me have my way and draw on his desk or why didn't he feel bad when he spoilt my pen.
And so many year after, he apologised.
I was literally gobsmacked. I did not expect him to keep note of it at all.
And somehow, it made me smile.
The last time I saw him was when he was going to church. He looked must healthier. =)
Seriously, I feel like laughing whenever I think of him, thanks to the diary I kept that year.
I recently unearthed a very very very old diary.
It was a diary for the year 2000, a yellow hard cover spiral bind one with some korean cartoon on the cover.
I was literally blushing as I flipped through it as it was full of childish thoughts and writings.
I once wanted to throw away the whole diary as my mother kept on threatening to invade my privacy.
She lock herself up in my room. I don't know for what but she is really known to rifle through my stuff.
I was so furious, I was brandishing the diary about at my aunt yelling and complaining that I was going to destroy it.
My aunt took it from me say she'll keep for me.
I said I wanted to get rid of it, she said she will throw it away from me.
Several years after, I mentioned it, and what do you know.
My aunt took it out of her wardrobe and passed it back to me.
................
I guess she knew how precious memories were when I was at an age that didn't know it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
#3 - G
I've seen G before I started secondary school.
Walked out of my room all groggy and squinty eyed to see him in my hall with his side parting and spectacles and frowned at him for coming over to my house at such a god forsaken (it was really 6+am -.-) hour to revise ENGLISH with my brother.
ENGLISH.
REVISE. -.-
Now G, to me, was an absolute laugh fest of a puppy crush.
I cannot help giggling, laughing out loud and all sorts whenever I think about that short stint.
Anyhow, as you may have guessed from the above paragraph.
Yes, a friend of my brother. GAWD, that sounded so damn awful.
NOBODY TELL HIM OR I SHUT THIS POST DOWN. HMPH.
In fact, G was the main reason why me, a TOTAL lazy assed person who used to mock at uniformed groups and their so-called "discipline" and rules, joined NPCC.
WTF. First M, now G. Why am I always the one following people! Why no one follow me!
A guy friend, who would be mentioned later on, was gawking at my reason for joining and was saying that he thinks it was bloody sacrificial of me to do so as he really thinks that NPCC was something that girls usually shunned.
[ Indeed, approx 8 girls initially in my batch, only 3 passed out including me]
*DIGRESS*
However, I will say one thing, I am damn grateful for G's presence and influence in my decision making to join NPCC as it was one of the best decisions I have ever made in my entire life.
Yes, I passed out only a mere corporal ( Auto promoted some more coz I failed the drill test 3 times, was initially an ACTING corporal only.) and skipped SO much of it, that really, I shouldn't have any CCA grade for it at all, but I still garnered an A2 with Mao hurling a vulgarity at me when he found out. HAHA.
Mao is a classmate of mine for 4 years straight in Secondary school.
Initially both of us were logger heads, we'd snap at each other, scream, scold & flip each other's table, but due to NPCC, he is one of the friends I really bother to chase after and call out to chit chat.
The experiences & friends I made, though some may be not in contact anymore, were priceless.
The after CCA lunches, the mad rush we make to KY's house for Holland V last time, eating together, practicing skits and stupid stuff and oh my god the bloody camps and competitions!
Even now in everyday life I use some of the camp craft skills I learned. ( Fcuking terrible at it btw. Only remember the clove hitch i think? For pitching tents and the ship shank for tightening rope. Just used it when tying up CNY decoration for my aunts.)
Felt damn accomplished please.
HAHAHAHA.
OMALA WAS MY SENIOR IS NPCC TOO, though we weren't close at all at that point of time and WITH GOOD REASON TOO THAT MOFO. WTF.
I'll will talk about him later!
KY, Sim & I lived pretty close together, so we'd always take the bus home together after our CCA activities and stop at this central location near our area to go take a look at puppies or just chill at KY's place.
KY, though idiotic sometimes when it comes to stuff and acting all not serious and etc, is very perceptive.
When my 1st relationship was over, remember I mentioned that I literally drag myself out of bed to watch TV, tired already go sleep and all?
I one day, decided to just go to this NPCC outing planned during the holidays to watch a movie.
Best decision I've ever made during that period.
I arrived at school and I couldn't stop laughing. Mao was like, " Trying to cheat me la! Don't bluff , you don't look sad at all etc."
Ky was like the only one after everyone went off and turned to me and asked me whether I was ok anot, still very sad is it?
......... In a very... gentle tone some more sia. =s *tearing up*
ARGH. Don't digress already. Go back to topic!
*END OF DIGRESSION*
Why he caught my attention?
Well maybe it is also because he was my freshmen orientation camp leader and he was putting attention on me due to the fact that he knew me before hand?
It was fun, those days, I still kept paper diaries.
At the end of secondary school, I had a good thick few books filled page to page with assortments.
And there was this book , the period, where there were a lot of scribblings in it about my interactions with G. And I would describe it WORD for WORD please.
If he smiled in a cheeky way, I would write it down.
If he said, " I want to eat bananas and maybe I won't but I feel like eating bananas"
I would write, [ he said, " I want to eat bananas and maybe I won't but I feel like eating bananas"]
I was that irritating. XD HAHAHAHAHAHA
But I did remember writing one sentence that for my actions.
" I write this stuff down is because one day, I am scared I will forget."
Well, no use anyway coz due to my mother's constant risk of the diaries getting into her hands, I one day, after a suspicious/argument episode, threw out one thick stack of diaries.
I do regret doing that. A lot.
And its true, I've forgotten quite a bit of things already.
After secondary school, a good few years into Poly.
I dug through my memo box to pack stuff.
And I found, in a metal blue tin, a stick of gum.
And I was literally smiling to myself about my idiocy.
It was given by G.
Just a stupid simple gesture of seeing me near by and offering me a sweet, I also ate the gum and bothered to fold properly the metal foil and slip it back into the green paper band to make it look as though it was untouched and put it on a metal box so that it won't get crushed some more.
See what I mean when I say I felt like laughing?
By then I was dating ZX already, and I threw it away, figuring that I don't think I would need a memory of another guy anymore.
How silly of me, again.
Oh well!
G like another girl, this I knew, but hey! When it comes to one-sided crushes, you know who to call ;]
-------------------------------------------------------------
#4 -T
T was the sweetest thing ever to happen to me.
Why?
Simply because he was the first ever dude to like me. ME leh.
In sec 1/2 when I was like this short haired tom boy running. screaming and arguing around.
He was in the class beside mine and I didn't know of his existence until things unfolded.
One by one, just like ripples in the water, reactions started clicking off just by ONE simple act.
I walked past this school mate whom my friends are very close with due to their CCA, and asked her whether did she see my said friends mentioned above.
I still remember, that VERY moment I met and asked her.
#1, she bloody stared and stared at me in amazement.
#2, she continued to stare -.- I hope you girls know who I am talking about LOL
And I was like o.O Woah, what is ON my face?
Turned out as the days go by we started to chat if we bump into each other and all, and one day, she blurted out.
"Got someone in my class likes you leh!"
And I was like 0.0 *cue: WUUUUUUT*
And from then on.
Pester time.
pester pester pester her like siao.
Followed her into the canteen,pester pester pester, and when she walk past my class table my class girls were like looking at me and asking what was I doing and when they found out what she said, all of them went 0.0 and also started to pester her like crazy. And Stephanie, who was on prefect duty initially in recess came and asked what was the commotion about and when she heard it, she started to scream and we all know when she screams we really give in to her
And yea.
That friend pointed him out, siting in a row of benches during recess.
...... And you know what.
He was pretty decent looking.
Yes I am so shallow laaaa. Shut up , it was like, I don't know, I had really low self-esteem and wth suddenly some guy I have never met "likes" me?
And from then on, on hell broke loose. And looking back on it, damn. He was damn sweet.
- To be continued-
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