The busier I get, the more I like to shop from home. 
With a business and four young children- I am shopping online more and more. Plus- It's so fun to get packages in the mail :) 
I found a cool site for sprinkles. Yes- you heard me right- sprinkles. Here are some of their St. Patrick's Day looks:
I like the idea of sticking a chocolate shamrock in my cupcakes also.
Or some cute St. Patrick's Day picks.
It's called Shopbakersnook.com. What a find!
The Blue and Gold banquet for the boy scouts is this evening- so my friend is working on a cupcake collection shaped like a flag. I wanted to show him this similar look from my cupcake book, Hello, Cupcake.
I cannot believe the speed with which Lent has approached this year.
I've still got Christmas decorations waiting to go up in the loft.
It used to be months from Christmas to Lent - not days like it is now.
Perhaps my advancing years have something to do with it.
Anyway, having prepared a very nice tea, followed by a pudding with custard, my kitchen has now turned into this:
...and looks like remaining so until the batter runs out.
And anyone who has got the time to do this:
........should come and spend a week in this house.
That would sort their prioroities out.
Please don't try to contact me. I shall be on a mission wandering round the house looking for any spare chocolate to eat before midnight.
If I could have got near this computer yesterday I may well have written a post entitled
'Thank God it's Friday'
which would have summed up my half term holiday week - kids, extra kids, rabbits, my mother.....the list goes on.
'Thank God it's Friday'
which would have summed up my half term holiday week - kids, extra kids, rabbits, my mother.....the list goes on.
If I had more than two minutes to spend here now, I might write a post called
'Run, Rabbit, Run',
in which you would realise, if you are familiar with the wartime song, why my sympathies lie firmly with the farmer and his gun, gun, gun.
Instead, and since I only have two minutes, I shall relate a small, but exasperating vignette of my day.
Naturally, it involves the Father of This Lot.
Him: Right - I'm watching the football later. If you want to go shopping, you'll have to go early. That's if you want to go.......
Me: Let's see. There have been upwards of seven kids here all week. They have eaten us out of house and home. If we were Jewish we wouldn't have to search out crumbs, because there aren't any.
OF COURSE I WANT TO GO SHOPPING!
Him: I'll have to pick the car up from the garage. Back in a bit.
An hour passed. And another.
I rang him.
Me: Where are you? When you said 'back in a bit' I assumed you meant the five minutes it takes to drive home from the garage....
Him: I'm just helping out...I'm taking signwriting off a van.....it's quite good actually - there's a machine a bit like a paint stripper.....
Me: Spare me the details. Hurry up - I've got to get something for tea......
Him: Right. I'll be about an hour.
That was at half past one.
At twenty five to four I rang again.
Me: Let me guess......the Mare and Foal?
Him: No, actually......The Cotton Tree......
And to think I was wondering only yesterday what to give up for Lent........
Technology allows me to stay connected with my adorable children. Even when I don't really care to. I was about to clear my text messages on my cell and thought I'd share the following REAL, untouched examples of the tender messages my children have recently texted to me. Motherhood is so rewarding.
Hey ANSWER YOUR PHONE!
Mom i don't think i should be grounded just cause i didn't wash my hair...don't you agree...were you ever grounded cause you didn't wash your hair?
Mom my belly button hurts jessica said there could be an infection in there
I forgot to do my homework
(sent to me by D2, when she clearly meant to send it to her best friend)
do you wanna talk bout boys
Mom that was a joke
Ha lol
Mom it was a joke say something
(sent to me while I was two rooms away at bed time)
Mom (D1) has her light on and wont turn it off
(sent when a package arrived in the mail at Christmas time)
Mom my Ugg boots came Can I open them?
(sent after I failed to immediately respond to a text message)
See you dont care about my life do you well good nite person hoo does not care :(
Mom will you for once answer your phone
(sent to me after someone didn't like what I served for dinner)
Can i have 5 dollars and go get myself a chicken bowl
Mom i don't think i should be grounded just cause i didn't wash my hair...don't you agree...were you ever grounded cause you didn't wash your hair?
Mom my belly button hurts jessica said there could be an infection in there
I forgot to do my homework
(sent to me by D2, when she clearly meant to send it to her best friend)
do you wanna talk bout boys
Mom that was a joke
Ha lol
Mom it was a joke say something
(sent to me while I was two rooms away at bed time)
Mom (D1) has her light on and wont turn it off
(sent when a package arrived in the mail at Christmas time)
Mom my Ugg boots came Can I open them?
(sent after I failed to immediately respond to a text message)
See you dont care about my life do you well good nite person hoo does not care :(
Mom will you for once answer your phone
(sent to me after someone didn't like what I served for dinner)
Can i have 5 dollars and go get myself a chicken bowl
We often remind our oldest, that our parenting skills are getting better and better with each child, thanks to all the mistakes we've made parenting him.
Family Councils, as we call them, are how we coordinate our family calendar. A few nights ago, we were discussing schedules for the children. When it became known that S1 was about to receive a privilege to drive himself to a special event, S2 started to grumble about the unfairness of the situation. He quickly stopped himself however, and in a sarcastic tone, unusual for him, he confessed,
"Oh, that's right. I forgot. You are the Golden Child."
S1, who is clear on a regular basis about his many hardships as the oldest child, corrected his little brother,
"You mean I'm the Lab Rat. Right?"
Oh yes......trying to ascertain what on earth the Football Fanatic had been doing all morning.
FF: Mum, what's the panic? I've got twelve missed phone calls and three texts from Ryan.
Enter Ryan, stage left.
Ryan is a good friend of the Football Fanatic.
Ryan lives with Jack. Remember Jack?
Well, not 'lives with' obviously. Shares a flat with.
Actually, at the moment shares a villa in Spain with, because that's where they've both gone to open a new nightclub, but I digress....
(Yes, Jack's still around. And don't be fooled by the fact that he's living in Spain. He nips back to watch home matches and take the Football Fanatic out with alarming regularity).
Back to Ryan. Ryan knows a lot about police procedure. He's been in a lot of police stations.
Put bluntly, Ryan likes a good fight. Not a dirty fight, you understand, just the lager-and-testosterone-fuelled Saturday night sort of fighting that young men have indulged in for generations.
Ryan uses a police van on a Saturday night like other people use a taxi home. In fact Jack was once heard to say that if Ryan sees a Tactical Aid Unit in the city and he's not in it, he feels like he's missed out.
In short, Ryan knows how long it takes to give a witness statement.
Text 1 (11.30): Are you out yet? How did it go? Ryan
Text 2 (12.00) What's going on? Are you still in there? Ryan
Text 3 (12.30) WHERE ARE YOU? I've been arrested, questioned, charged and out on bail in less time than this....
The Football Fanatic maintained that she had just been talking to the policeman.
Talking him to death more like. For an incident which took approximately two minutes, the poor policeman was required to write EIGHT A4 SHEETS of paper, which was her account of what had happened.
At one point, she drew him a floor plan. Not a floor plan of the hotel where the incident took place, but a floor plan of the department store, outlining where everybody works, how everybody is inter-related and probably who fancies who.
About an hour into the interview, another police officer actually came into the room to check whether everything was okay. The poor officer taking the statement was probably so dazed at this point that he wanted to shout 'HELP ME' but couldn't actually form the words.
Obviously, I cannot write the entire transcript of the interview, but here are a few little gems:
PC: Had everybody had a lot to drink?
FF: Well, I don't know about anyone else, but I hadn't. Not at £8 for a vodka and coke, anyway. I'd had two drinks. I think I've still got the bill somewhere.....it actually says a single and a double, but everybody tasted it and we all agreed there's no way that was a double.....
PC: So what happened then?
FF: Well, I went in to get Karen and Sheila.......Sheila from Shoes, that is, not Sheila from Menswear......and I told them what had happened but no-one believed me, so I explained the whole thing again and then Sheila said 'Come on, our Emma, get your coat'.....because Sheila's Emma's mother.....did I already tell you that?
PC: It takes quite a lot of force, you know, to push someone down a flight of stairs.......
FF: Oh no. Not those two. They're only about seven stone each.....which by the way, is my target weight.......
PC: And then?
FF: Well, I knew it was bad because she was lying there at the bottom of the stairs and her leg was at a funny angle, and so was her arm. But I'll tell you how I really knew it was bad......when she fell, her dress flew up and she had black knickers on....and there's no way she would have carried on lying there with her knickers showing if she hadn't been really hurt........
Shall I carry on?
I thought not.
But you get the picture, don't you?
I can honestly say that Bootle Street nick have never been more glad to get rid of anyone in their entire history.
Jack came home from Spain for her birthday and spent the next two days shaking his head in disbelief at the amount of drivel she had actually come out with.
In the end though, we did come up with a positive slant on the situation.
In the event that the Football Fanatic ever does get in trouble with the police on a Saturday night, they will radio her name through to the desk, and a sergeant with a modicum of common sense may well radio back:
For God's sake, don't bring her in.
We'll be here three weeks.
Well the winner by a country mile was A, or
'Why The Football Fanatic Spent Her Birthday At The Police Station'
so here it is.
I've noticed we've got a few new readers, so for their benefit I feel I must point out again that the Football Fanatic, whilst highly intelligent, is alarmingly lacking in common sense.
(If you stick with this blog, this will probably become more and more apparent, as age does not appear to be wearying this trait).
Oh yes. She eats a lot. And talks a lot. Please keep this in mind, as it is rather pertinent to the story.
A few weeks ago, the Football Fanatic attended a staff 'do'. Dinner Dance, actually, at a rather posh hotel in town. During the course of the evening, a fight broke out. I say fight - it was more of an all-out brawl, fists flying, furniture flying, the works, which culminated in two sisters being pushed down a flight of stairs by a person who shall remain nameless, as this whole post is probably 'sub judice' and I am more than likely in imminent danger of being had up for contempt of court or similar in the very near future.
Anyway, the only witness to this sordid event (because she happened to be coming out of the Ladies Room which was near the staircase) was the Football Fanatic, who was subsequently called into the police station to give a statement.
Police Officer: Hello, I wondered if you could come in and give a witness statement this morning?
Football Fanatic: This morning? Well....I suppose I could.....but can you tell me how long it will take? It's my birthday, you see, and I've got to meet someone at dinnertime and after that I've got a surprise party arranged that I'm not supposed to know about, obviously.....
Police Officer: It won't take long. Half an hour at the most. Is eleven o'clock ok?
So, off she went. I did offer to go with her, but she was adamant that she'd be alright on her own. I told her to ring me as soon as she'd finished, which by my reckoning would be about half past eleven.
As you have probably guessed, half past eleven came and went. So did quarter to twelve........and twelve o'clock.
Where on earth could she be?
Ten past twelve....quarter past twelve......
By this time I thought she was in a cell somewhere and that I would be getting a call soon asking me to come and pick her up.
Finally, at half past twelve, the phone rang.
'Hello? Mum? It's me'
'What in God's name have you been doing all this time?'
Part Two tomorrow.......sorry, but there's a houseful of kids, plus two extra, plus rabbits, plus the Father of This Lot.......and I genuinely haven't got another minute to spend at this computer. At the moment, my cup not only runneth over, but is in danger of becoming a flash flood.
Here's the thing.
I have several things to tell you, but a very busy day ahead. (See C, below).
So, I thought you could vote for which story you wanted to hear first. (Though why you would want to hear any of them remains somewhat of a mystery).
Here's the choices.
Would you like to know:
A) Why the Football Fanatic spent most of the morning of her birthday at a police station......
B) Why there are a family of rabbits living in the front bedroom, causing The Fixer and The Peacemaker to sleep downstairs for the last two weeks so as not to disturb them.........or.........
C) In the light of B above, what on earth I am going to do with the two friends The Peacemaker has invited for a birthday sleepover TOMORROW.............
It's up to you.
Vote A, B or C.
Calls will cost 50p from a BT landline. Charges from mobile networks may vary.
Lines will close at midnight.
If you want me, I'll be cleaning.
Again.
Warm Chocolate Cupcakes with Molten Centers
Chocolate ganache (recipe follows), chilled at least one hour
Vegetable oil spray for misting the pans
All-purpose flour for dusting the pans
1
(18.25-ounce) package plain, no-pudding devil's food cake mix
1
cup water
½
cup vegetable oil
3
large eggs
1
teaspoon pure vanilla extract
½
teaspoon ground cinnamon
¼
cup powdered sugar, for dusting
Whipped cream (optional)
At least one hour before baking (or a day ahead of time), prepare the chocolate ganache; cover it with plastic wrap and place it in the refrigerator to chill and firm up.
Place a rack in the center of the oven and preheat the oven to 400 F.
Lightly mist 24 cupcake cups (two pans holding a dozen cakes each) with vegetable oil spray and dust them with flour. Shake out the excess flour. Set the pans aside.
Place the cake mix, water, oil, eggs, vanilla and cinnamon in a large mixing bowl. Blend with an electric mixer on low speed for 30 seconds. Stop the machine and scrape down the sides of the bowl with a rubber spatula. Increase the mixer speed to medium and blend 1 ½ to 2 minutes more, scraping down the sides again if needed. The batter should look well-combined and thickened.
Spoon or scoop 1/3 cup batter into each prepared cup, filling it three quarters of the way full. (You will get between 22 and 24 cupcakes.) Drop a heaping teaspoonful of ganache onto the top of the batter in each cup. Place the pans in the oven. Bake until the cake bakes up around the ganache, the tops are domed and the cupcakes spring back when lightly pressed with your finger, 12 to 14 minutes.
Remove pans from the oven and place them on wire racks for 1 minute. Run a dinner knife around the edges of the cupcake cups. Lift the cupcakes from the bottoms of the cups using the end of the knife and pick them out of the cups carefully with your fingertips. (Cupcakes may be made up to a day ahead and stored, in a cake saver or under a glass dome, at room temperature for up to a day.)
To reheat so the centers are molten once again, place the cupcakes on a microwave-safe plate and cover with paper towels. Heat on High (100 percent power) for 10 seconds; carefully remove. Sift powdered sugar over the tops of the cakes. Place each cupcake on a dessert plate. If desired, serve with a small dollop of whipped cream. Serve immediately. Makes 22 to 24 cupcakes
Lightly mist 24 cupcake cups (two pans holding a dozen cakes each) with vegetable oil spray and dust them with flour. Shake out the excess flour. Set the pans aside.
Place the cake mix, water, oil, eggs, vanilla and cinnamon in a large mixing bowl. Blend with an electric mixer on low speed for 30 seconds. Stop the machine and scrape down the sides of the bowl with a rubber spatula. Increase the mixer speed to medium and blend 1 ½ to 2 minutes more, scraping down the sides again if needed. The batter should look well-combined and thickened.
Spoon or scoop 1/3 cup batter into each prepared cup, filling it three quarters of the way full. (You will get between 22 and 24 cupcakes.) Drop a heaping teaspoonful of ganache onto the top of the batter in each cup. Place the pans in the oven. Bake until the cake bakes up around the ganache, the tops are domed and the cupcakes spring back when lightly pressed with your finger, 12 to 14 minutes.
Remove pans from the oven and place them on wire racks for 1 minute. Run a dinner knife around the edges of the cupcake cups. Lift the cupcakes from the bottoms of the cups using the end of the knife and pick them out of the cups carefully with your fingertips. (Cupcakes may be made up to a day ahead and stored, in a cake saver or under a glass dome, at room temperature for up to a day.)
To reheat so the centers are molten once again, place the cupcakes on a microwave-safe plate and cover with paper towels. Heat on High (100 percent power) for 10 seconds; carefully remove. Sift powdered sugar over the tops of the cakes. Place each cupcake on a dessert plate. If desired, serve with a small dollop of whipped cream. Serve immediately. Makes 22 to 24 cupcakes
Chocolate Ganache: Place 3/4 cup heavy cream in a small, heavy saucepan over medium heat. Bring it to a boil, stirring. Meanwhile, place 11/3 cups semisweet chocolate chips (such as Ghirardelli double-chocolate baking chips) in a large, stainless-steel mixing bowl. Remove cream from the heat and pour it over the chocolate. Stir with a wooden spoon until the chocolate has melted. If desired, stir in 1 tablespoon of your choice of liqueur, such as crème de cacao (or 1 teaspoon of vanilla). Cover with plastic wrap and chill for at least one hour (or up to 24 hours) so that the mixture thickens.
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